Best Groaner Joke: Laugh despite yourself.

The grim-faced cop knocks on her door in a fishing town.
I have some bad news. And some good news.  And some very good news.
Shocked, she asks:  What is the bad news?
We're very sorry to report your husband has drowned and was found just offshore.
Oh my God!  But you say there is good news too?
Yes. When we pulled him up, there were three large lobster on him.
That's appalling!  How can there be even better news?
We're bringing him up again tomorrow.